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| Mae Tolstedt | Bertha and Mae Tolstedt |
Note: The text of this section is excerpted from Tales of Tolstedts, by Grandon E. Tolstedt, MD and Betsy E. Tolstedt, Ph.D..
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| Mae Tolstedt | Bertha and Mae Tolstedt |
Born on August 16, 1876 in Laurel, Iowa, Mae was the youngest of the Tolstedt children. She would have been sixteen when her mother died. We know that Mae was married twice: first to a man named Pearl Pratt, then to a man named Harry Rice, who was a telegrapher for a number of newspapers in Des Moines. We have no information about the marriage to Pearl Pratt, except that at the time of the 1895 states census in Minnesota, they were married. It is unclear as to how the marriage ended. Sometime before the 1900 Census, Mae married Harry Rice. Harry's brother, Ulysses, was married to Pearl's sister, Norma Pratt. The Census shows Harry and Mae living with his parents in Des Moines, Iowa. Harry Rice was not liked by those of the Tolstedt family who met him. We are not exactly sure why. Given that Ulrich and his sons had the same reaction to Bertha's husband, it may have been that no one was good enough for the Tolstedt girls in the minds of their male relatives. It is also possible that his personality caused the dislike. Like his father-in-law, Harry was an opinionated grump. He did have some admirable qualities. More than once, he and Mary took in a wayward Tolstedt, including both a niece and a nephew of Mary. He was a hard-worker, despite severe arthritis of the hands in his later years. He supported his family through difficult times. Mae and Harry had two children, a boy named Marion Paul Rice, who was adopted, and a girl name Margaret, who was most likely not adopted.
What little information we have about Mae comes predominantly from W.L. Tolstead and from Mae's grandson, Marion John Rice. From W.L. Tolstead, “I visited Aunt Mae in Des Moines several times when I was a boy. She never had any children of her own, but there was an adopted son and daughter. About 1952 I visited the place, which was south of the fairgrounds in Des Moines and the boy (Marion) lived there then with many children and the place was a mess, in contrast to the way Aunt Mae kept it up. [Note: the “many” children was three, and Marion’s wife was likely more focused on feeding and caring for her family than on dealing with her father-in-law’s clutter.]
Mae’s husband Harry Rice worked as telegrapher for one of the newspapers of the day, receiving telegrams from where ever. It must have been very hard work because I remember hearing him complain about the awful affect it had on his nerves. He was not very pleasant”.
Marion John Rice (Harry’s grandson) recalls times his grandfather would take him and his brothers for rides on the streetcars in Des Moines. The ride would culminate in a picnic fire near the tracks, followed by the return trip home.
Mae’s nephews, Glen Tolstedt and Bill (Wilbur William) Tolstedt thought highly of her. Bill knew her the best and spent time in her home in Des Moines, Iowa one winter, much to the unhappiness of Harry. Bill Tolstedt was a large, kind, easygoing man who always had a good word and a funny story. He had one dislike and that was goats. During the Depression, Bill did not have a job, and with winter coming, he stopped in Des Moines, Iowa, at his Aunt Mae and Uncle Harry Rice's and asked for a place to sleep for the winter. Uncle Harry, who was a disagreeable and belligerent individual, reluctantly agreed, with the stipulation that Bill had to work. Bill was assigned, among other tasks, the care of six goats. Twice daily he had to walk the goats several hundred yards for water. The goats were mean. They would circle him on their leashes, try to knock him down, try to trip him and deposit goat dung where he would step in it. The winter passed and Bill left for goat-free work; but his dislike of goats and of Harry persisted.
Hary and Mary Rice
Mae’s grandson, Marion J. Rice, shared with us the following recollections: “Mary died when I was six and even though we lived only a mile away I can't remember seeing her that often. I recall the goats and the horrible tasting goats’ milk. A little kid wouldn't forget something like that. Grandpa had a ten-acre farm which was between 33rd and 34th and north of Scott St. almost to the Rock Island tracks. He grew corn on the north eight acres but someone else did the work. Grandpa didn't have any machinery except an old puddle-jumper made from the front of a 1923 Chevy truck and a Rucksell rear-end from a Ford truck. It had two transmissions in series to slow it down. Most of the south two acres was unused. The house sat on the southwest corner with a nice yard east of the house. Out back was what we called the old house. A pair of doors had been installed on the east wall of what had been a living room and the floor sawed out of that room to make a garage. The other two rooms were full of what we thought of as junk. I would give my eyeteeth for that junk now! East of the old house was a shed, east of that was a chicken coop and east of that was a barn with the rusted remains of a boiler. East of the barn were the remains of a long green house which no longer had any of the structure above the concrete foundations. Compared to our house on 36th St. the house was huge and very nice but it also had no bathroom or anyplace other than the kitchen to wash up.
Grandpa had to sell the Scott St. property when the city put a sewer line around three sides and he couldn't pay the assessment. This happened some time after I had graduated from Iowa State. The old house was gone by then. The house has since burnt down. They bought a house on the south side near Lincoln High School. My grandfather, father and mother all died during the time they lived in that house.
I remember seeing a huge open sore on Grandma Rice's arm probably half the length of her forearm. She died shortly after that. In later years I had always thought it had been cancer. The funeral record does indicate breast cancer as the cause of death. Before my aunt Wilma Burrows died in 1997 I asked her about the open sore on Grandma Rice’s arm. She said it was caused by blood poisoning from a cut she (Mary) had gotten on a fence in the barnyard. Grandpa Rice didn't like doctors because they (the A.M.A.) wouldn't accept the medicine developed by his father Ulysses Augustus Rice, who was a graduate of King Eclectic Medical College. Mary probably didn't get proper medical treatment, which may have contributed to her early death. I sensed there was a lot of family resentment towards Harry. I also heard he had wasted Mary's inheritance. Maybe that's how he built the barn and greenhouse.
We also have the family story that Harry was the biological father of Marion having gotten the family maid pregnant. This has never been confirmed.
Doctor Ulysses Rice (Harry’s father) was instrumental in forming a nurses association in Des Moines about 1890/91. He was a ship's doctor on the Laredo taking ex slaves to Liberia as colonists.
Harry Rice had a brother, Ulysses, Jr., who lived in Des Moines, Iowa. I wasn't aware of this until I started my family research. In all the years I lived in Des Moines I never heard mention of the man. Ulysses was married to Norma Pratt the sister of Pearl Pratt the alleged first husband of Mary Antoinette”
Mae was listed as next of kin when her father Ulrich died. She and Harry evidently helped care for Ulrich at some level before he died. The rest of the family was living far away. Mae died in 1937 at age sixty-one.
Harry died in Des Moines in 1962. His obituary follows.
Harry A. Rice Rites Thursday
Services for Harry A. Rice, of 1109 Pleasant View Drive, a retired telegrapher, will be at 1:30 PM Thursday at the Hamilton Funeral Home. Burial will be in Woodland Cemetery.
Mr. Rice died Tuesday at Broadlawns Polk County Hospital after a six-year illness. He was born at Commerce and was a telegrapher for the Associated Press before his retirement in 1937. He was previously with the Des Moines Register and Tribune. He was a member of the Seventh Day Adventist Church and was a member and past master of East Gate Masonic Lodge.
Surviving are a son Marion P. of Des Moines; a daughter Mrs. Margaret Kline of Corydon; several grandchildren and eight great-grandchildren.